I do not think I was upheld by the hope that any moment the light
might break in upon me; for I scarcely thought about that. I
went on with a dull endurance, varied by moments of
uncontrollable sadness; for more and more the conviction grew
upon me that I should never see the white lady again. It may
seem strange that one with whom I had held so little communion
should have so engrossed my thoughts; but benefits conferred
awaken love in some minds, as surely as benefits received in
others. Besides being delighted and proud that my songs had
called the beautiful creature to life, the same fact caused me to
feel a tenderness unspeakable for her, accompanied with a kind of
feeling of property in her; for so the goblin Selfishness would
reward the angel Love. When to all this is added, an
overpowering sense of her beauty, and an unquestioning conviction
that this was a true index to inward loveliness, it may be
understood how it came to pass that my imagination filled my
whole soul with the play of its own multitudinous colours and
harmonies around the form which yet stood, a gracious marble
radiance, in the midst of ITS white hall of phantasy. The time
passed by unheeded; for my thoughts were busy. Perhaps this was
also in part the cause of my needing no food, and never thinking
how I should find any, during this subterraneous part of my
travels.
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