Is that just, or even manly? Yet, in nine cases out of
ten, the law takes no notice of the offence.
"_To get a light, or because others do it._" Are you not convinced now
that, when you use these words, you are not speaking the truth?
III.
I do not think I ever met anybody who was quite as moral, or quite as
original, as I am. You should give a complete set of my works to each
of your children. I might have generalised on the ill-effects of those
vices from a special case--my own case. Had I done so, I could have
got it printed. I can get anything printed that I write. I preferred
to take a newer line, and to show you how vile you are when you use
matches. Everything is vile. But you are wondering, perhaps, how a
great novelist becomes a small faddist. You must wait till next month,
and then read my article on the immorality of parting one's hair with
a comb. A common table-fork is the only pure thing with which one can
part one's hair. Combs deaden the conscience. But more of this anon.
* * * * *
OUR BOOKING-OFFICE.
What is this the Baron reads in the _D.T._ of Feb. 9, and in the
_Daily Graphic_ of the same date? Here is a portion of the extract
from the _D.T._:--"The Monthly Meeting of that quaint Literary
Society, 'Ye Odd Volumes,' at Limmer's Hotel, brought together not
merely a goodly show of the Volumes themselves, but an unusually
large array of visitors," and then follows the distinguished list, the
crowning point being reached when we come to the name of "The Baron de
BOOK-WORMS of _Punch_," and in the _Daily Graphic_ the daring reporter
goes a step farther, as, after giving the name of a certain honoured
guest, he parenthetically explains that this academical _convive_
is _the_ "Baron de B.
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